Francesca's Poem

This poem was sent to me by my 12 year old niece. She is a vivacious, smart, inquisitive, and beautiful young lady who seems to be happy almost all the time. Francesca stayed by my side during Chemo Week 1 and helped nurse me to health. I am truly touched and blessed by her and her family (my sister et. al.). They are a true source of strength. I originally posted this as a comment to one of the blogs, but I think it warrants its own posting.


Uncle-
You are always in our prayers.
my uncle is strong and
my uncle has courage
my uncle was sometimes weak
my uncle gets stronger every week
my uncle loves people so much
my uncle is gentle to the touch
I Love My Uncle!!!!

HUGS AND KISSES
- Francesca A. Music

Chemo - Round 3 Starts

Today starts round 3 of chemo. Whoopee! Ethel the Wonder Pump is back from today through Friday again. Whoopee! I have to remind myself that Ethel is there to help and work towards my cure (a needed change of attitude towards her on my part).

Joan is back from Chicago to be my caregiver this and next week. I'm so grateful to her and TJ for this. I'm sure it is a sacrifice on their part that they will never admit too.

A little good news to share. I have managed to gain 9-1/2 lbs of weight this week. My goal was 10 lbs. so Lori told me that I need to round to the nearest whole number, thus 10 lbs. it is! Whoopee! The chemo squad was also happy hear this news. Dr. So (my chemo doc) got a big smile on her face when she saw the numbers from my weigh in.

So, do you know anyone else that would be happy about gaining 10 lbs in a week? Think hard! I love being a little different!

Life is Good!

Toby's Visit

The other evening I had a wonderful visit from Toby. Toby is both a friend and a co-worker who happens to live near by. Words to describe Toby are: energetic, intelligent, mentor, enthusiasm, caring, funny, giving, open, adventurous, and many more. She is one very cool person.

Another word for Toby is survivor. She has survived her own bout with cancer and has been very open about it with others, including me. I look at Toby as a "sort-of" mentor in getting me through chemo. When I first spoke with her about my diagnosis, she offered up the greatest piece of advice which I have definitely taken to heart. Her advice was "take it one thing at a time." She followed it with words to the effect of not trying to look at the entire challenge and all the steps, appointments, procedures, treatments, etc. as a whole, because it becomes overwhelming. This little piece of advice has helped in so many ways.

So Toby has been reading this blog and decided to bring me an excellent care package that included Carnation Instant Breakfast, herbal teas, a stuffed mascot with the wildest hair style one could imagine (Toby wrote that she hoped my hair did not come back like the mascot's), and a great book titled "The 2,548 Best Things Anyone Ever Said." So in light of the book and Toby's advice I'll leave you with a quote in the book that I feel is appropriate.

"It is only possible to live happily ever after on a day to day basis."
- Margaret Bonnano


Thanks Toby!

Indulgence - My Recovery Car

OK, this is not about just medicine, nausea, white blood cells, and all the other things that seem to take over one's life when cancer happens. There are some other things that go on which constitutes life in general. There can be indulgences too.

My son Stephen has turned 16 this year. Thus, the most important thing to him is driving (well possibly the second most important, after all there are girls to think about!). So there is a need for another car in the family. As such I thought I'd get an economy car, something small that I can use for a commuter car while Stephen uses my other car to get to & from school. The logical choice in my mind is the car I bought this past Sunday. A very slightly used 2006 Mini Cooper S. Dubbed the "Recovery Car" by my nephew Andreas. I've been smiling ever since I got it. Driving can be fun, even in the Washington metropolitan area (believe it or not).

Life is Good!

Improvements - Some More of Them

I'm now a few days into my "normal week." I've gone to work the last couple of days, my white blood cell count is back to normal, I can eat, and I feel human again. It sure feels great to be back again!

So, its time to review some of the positives that have happened to me having gone through 2 rounds of chemo. These are symptoms that have improved so far. In this me versus cancer "soccer" game, it looks like I'm scoring more goals. So here are some descriptions of these goals.

1. Prior to chemo I had a constant pain in my chest. It was gone after Chemo 1 and remains gone still.

2. I can still swallow more in one gulp than prior to chemo.

3. I have an appetite and feel hungry, which hasn't happened for a couple months now. This is new after Chemo 2.

4. I have actually been able to eat chicken. Sunday evening I ate a couple of chicken enchiladas and tonight I ate some of my mom's famous chicken paprikash. I even went back for seconds. To put this in perspective, I have not had any meat for quite sometime as it was too difficult and painful to swallow. So this is major to me!

5. I have gained weight since last week. (Yeah me!)

Please excuse me while I celebrate these goals as if it were a soccer game on Telemundo:

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAL!!

Thanks for indulging me, I needed that!

So, bottom line, there is improvement in my cancer battle. Given the "fun" that is chemotherapy, it's great to see progress. My oncology surgeon surmises that these symptom improvements are indicators of the tumor shrinking. I'm a believer in this. Thus, I feel empowered to tackle the next round of chemo and I am looking forward to the next symptom improvement afterwards.

Recovery Week 2 (RW2)

Recovery Week 2 (RW2) has gone (in comparison to RW1) very well. We fought off the low grade fever during the early part of the week successfully. It reached 100.1 once but otherwise never got over 99.8 (remember that at 100.4 I'm supposed to get in touch with the doctors). We were also able to keep me out of the hospital (not a great feat for the normal population, but we're dealing with the chemo kid here!). It would seem that I started to come out of chemo funk-dom around Weds afternoon, and as of this writing (Friday morning) I'm feeling human again (no nasty remarks from the "peanut gallery" please). I was able to pack in the food yesterday fairly well and actually gained 4 lbs in the course of 1-1/2 days. When you think of the joy that many have expressed to me with that statement today, you then start to realize how absurd this really is. Is there anyone that you know that would be happy to have picked up over 4 lbs of weight in a day?!? Well you may be reading about one of the very few in America!


OK, lessons learned this week:

1. Carnation Instant Breakfast (the powder) in small glasses with a straw is a life saver.

2. Herbal teas really help keeping me hydrated.

3. After 3 days, the side effects of Nuprogen keep me awake at night.

4. My mornings are consistently better than my afternoon & evenings.

5. I love having my friends around me when I'm not feeling well. I really don't have a chance to feel down or sorry form myself. Even if I feel like kaka, the spirit around here help to keep my attitude up and a smile on my face (even when they have a little fun at my expense).

6. I'm told by the ladies that have been here over the last couple of weeks that I now know the effects of pregnancy. Things like the constantly changing taste buds, cravings for a particular food, nausea, tiredness, no alcohol in the diet (even though I did want a glass of wine a couple of times), aversion to the sight of certain things, etc. were some of the things I experience that they tell me are some of the grand fun and beauty of pregnancy. It really make me wonder how any family has more than one child!?!?!

7. Being without hair on your head has advantages. More on this in another blog entry as it has many things that can be discussed.

8. Family & friends really do rise to the occasion. The way these folks have rallied the last couple of weeks has been unbelievable. The care, the concern, and the support have been just phenomenal. I really love these folks (I don't know how or if anyone could get through this by themselves).

Finally, as I've said so many times in past writings, I am a very lucky and blessed man.

LIFE IS GOOD!

Recovery Week 2 - So Far

Recovery week so far has had it's ups and downs, which is to be expected. Essentially my team & I have been battling a very low grade fever all week. However, we kind of expected it as I'm taking Nupegon shots daily. One of the side effects can be a raised temperature. Nupegon is a white blood cell enhancer, thus the need for it after my last chemo experience. All this said, I want to emphasize that in comparison, Recovery Week 2 (RW2) is going much better than RW1. As of today (Weds in the week), during RW1 I was in a fetal position, with a temperature that landed me in the hospital. This time around, I was able to take a walk around the neighborhood, ingest food and drink, hold an actual conversation, and smile. In addition, I'm actually having lucid thoughts (I'm sure this a shocker to many of those reading along!). The world is just plainly much better this time around. However, I'm not yet trying to be overtly confident yet, as this is still uncharted territory.



My care team this week has consisted of the Joan (the ultimate stabilizer in this go around), with help from a myriad of others. Those that had scheduled to stay with me (Dave-o, Pete, E-man, and Katherine) and those that are administering my shots at home (Joe, Pam, Cindy, & Vernie). The shot givers are a big help in that 1st they are all registered nurses; 2nd I'm a big wimp when it comes to shots; 3rd I've had a bunch of volunteers that are ready to administer a little pain my way in the form un-trained shot givers; and 4th I don't think I could do it to myself, which is the way that it is prescribed. Have I mentioned that I hate shots (and I'm a big wimp)!



My care team also took it upon themselves to, shall I say, de-clutter my house, clean out my garden, straighten up my garage, re-arrange my pantry, do my laundry, and probably some other things that I have yet to discover. Unbelievable! Those that have been to the house may not recognize the place any more!



Any way, the help and support over the past 1-1/2 weeks has been amazing. People rallying with their talents and efforts has been tremendous. I've said it before, and I'll say it again; I'm a lucky and blessed man. Life is good (even if I'm not feeling totally human at a given moment).



PS: The Olympics has been a great distraction too. GO WORLD!

Chemo Week 2 Done!

So Chemo Week 2 (CW2) went much better then CW1! Between the help of Teej & Joan, Emily (my beautiful & courageous daughter), Dave-o, Pete, Katherine, Patty & Thom, and others I'm sure I'm forgetting, I was much better prepared for Recovery Week. Kaiser also added some medical things to help me recover easier. Things like hydration at the end of the week and Nupogen shots to boost my white blood cell count. So although CW2 was not a "walk in the park" it was much more successful than CW1.

PS: In the picture with TJ & Joan, I'm wearing the infamous blog hat.

PPS: The other picture has Dave-o on the right, TJ on left & yours truly in the middle!

Chemo Week 2 So Far

Chemo week this time around has gone much better so far (knock on wood). Having TJ, Joan, & Emily around has made all the difference. The three of them have taken such wonderful care of me. I'm hydrated, fed, and rested and I am feeling about a 1000 times better at this point in time when compared to last chemo week. I also think that having friends here helps with attitude and distraction from the 3 minute reminders that Ethel brings.

Last night we had a movie evening watching "A Fish Called Wanda." The running joke was that TJ & I would relive the fish swallowing scene with Emily's fish tank. She managed to booby trap her room to safe guard her little loved ones.

Today should bring more of the same, and hopefully continued success through this chemo week round. Tomorrow afternoon Ethel goes away again...yeah!

Improvements

I've noticed that in my recent writings that there has been a lot of focus on events surrounding my treatments and the help that I've been getting. So I thought that I'd write about a couple of symptom improvements in that came from the 1st round of chemo. These are very exciting to me, although they may seem somewhat mundane to the overtly healthy types.

First improvement noticed during my normal week (the 2nd week after turning Ethel in) was that swallowing seemed easier. I was able get down larger amounts without pain or discomfort. Although I have not ventured to try a steak! This of course made eating easier and less time consuming. I was also able to gain 3 - 4 lbs that week.

The second improvement was the the loss of a seemingly constant pain/ache in my chest at the base of my sternum. This pain had been persistent for about a month to 6 weeks prior to chemo and would really hurt whenever I hiccuped. However it seems to have disappeared, hopefully for good.

I look upon this as a couple of accomplishments on my road to victory, kind of like scoring a couple of goals in a soccer game. Although the game is not over yet, the goals certainly add to the momentum that can lead to victory. I like the advantage this gives me. Life is good!

Can't wait to see what accomplishments this chemo round brings.

Ethel is Back

Chemo happened today. It took about 6-1/2 hrs this time. Met with Dr. So and it looks like there might be a change in the chemo/radiation/surgery schedule. Dr. So will consult with Dr. Pelton to discuss options. Also, Dr. So has added additional hydration at the end of the week as well as Nuprogen shots to help me thru chemo recovery. I believe this will help avert some of the problems I had last time.

I read some more of Lance Armstrong's book "It's Not About the Bike." It turns out that I'm sharing one common chemo chemical with him, Cisplatnum. If it helped him, it most surely can help me too.

I got to sit next to a wonderful older lady during today's session, however I did not catch her name. She had immigrated from Cuba many years ago. She had proclaimed that she was coming up on her birthday. After a number of very bad guesses, some based on flattery and others just mistakes staring at the age of 70 & working my way up. I finally gave up at 80 to which she let me in on her secret. She was about to turn 88, which in truth seems much older than she appeared. Unfortunately she was in for lung cancer. I wish her luck in her battle!

TJ & Joan held my hand thru today and will continue to do so through the week. I think they are kind of spoiling me. It's great to have them around. I have to believe that this round of chemo will go better than the last just because of their help and positive ways. Thanks goodness they are here.

Thanks to E-man and Lori for touching base and calling me today while at chemo. It always is nice to pass the time with friends.

Chemo Tomorrow

Tomorrow starts Chemo again. Angst and trepidation about the next couple of weeks surrond my feelings. I get to have my ambulatory pump companion, Ethel for the week again. As much as I hate her, I keep remembering that she is actually trying to help cure me. So I need to get my attitude toward her turned around. OK, I'll save the hatred toward her to later in the week when I'm especially tired of her 3-minute reminders of injections.

TJ & Joan are here to help me through this week. They're the silver lining to the chemo cloud. They arrived yesterday and we hit a barbecue picnic thing at another best friends' house, Pete & Martha. I'm sure with Teej & Joan here things will go better this week. Keep your fingers crossed!

Just remember, LIFE IS GOOD!

My New Hair Style

My hair started falling out this week. It started to go on Tuesday. By Wednesday I could pull out a bunch of it at a time if I grabbed it. It's a pretty weird thing to have happen. I kind of expected this occurrence, so I had an agreement with my kids when the time came. We agreed that they could shave my head. Designs were welcomed and fun was to be had. This is also a way for us as a family to take control of yet another part of this cancer adventure. So, Wednesday evening we did the deed. Stephen & Emily took part in the festivities, as did my buddy Dave-o and his wife Katherine. Many laughs were had (mostly at my expense), and we turned it into a rather joyous occasion. Afterwards we had root beer and orange floats. It was indeed a good time. Life is good!

Enjoy the pictures.