OK gang, for anyone that might be keeping track, only 7 radiation treatments to go.
For some reason I'm having trouble with motivation now that things are getting close to finishing. However, the prospect of being done soon is fantastic! I guess one could liken my motivational struggles to running a marathon. This adventure has been going on so long that it feels like one. Apparently, there comes a point in a marathon race where runners can hit a point where they "bonk." In layman's terms (or at least how I understand it), bonking is coming up against a point where your body & mind have a hard time to keep going. Lori told me the other day that often times the race organizers will have chicken soup at the 20 or 21 mile mark for those that are bonking. So, I'm working on my "chicken soup" now and trying to stay motivated. There is no question in my mind that I will finish this marathon in the fashion I want. However, it still feels as though the end will never get here. So instead of bonking, I'll keep on going after I get some "chicken soup."
"Chicken soup" comes in many forms. Most of it has come from those that have helped me through my chemo/recovery weeks, and Lori was a huge help to me today. However, some "chicken soup" comes from some of the most unexpected sources. For example, a little dose of chicken soup came from one of my radiation techs, aptly named Joy. Joy told me that she looked at my crazy blog writings over her holidays and left me a comment posting. I found the posting, and because of it, I have yet a little more strength for tomorrow's radiation treatment. Sometimes small doses of "chicken soup" helps a bunch! No "bonking" allowed!
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4 comments:
Hi, Steve,
I'm sending some virtual chicken soup your way. Once again I empathize with you, since your description of the lagging energy near the end brought back memories for me. At my five-year check-up, I told my oncologist that at times it's harder now than it was when I was in the middle of the fight of my life because people look at me, and I look normal, so except for Matt, my daughter, and my closest friends, people expect me to be fine. And there are times, thankfully few of them, when I'm not. I even had one person ask me recently how serious my cancer actually was, with an expression and a tone that suggested that I was exaggerating (since I'm still here) and should be over it by now and stop talking about it.
My oncologist told me that being a survivor is hard work but that the fact that I was working so hard is a huge part of the reason that I'm still here. And when I thought about it, I realized that Matt, Ashley, and my closest friends who do understand and have cheered me on and supported me every step of the way are also my lifeline. So when your energy lags, remember to turn to those of us who will send some positive energy and prayers your way when you need them. And hang in there for those few more treatments and for every survivor moment after that, knowing that we've got your back.
Estelene
Chicken Soup rocks! I couldn't do an Ironman without it! Glad you're getting a good dose of it - it will get you to the finish line!
Joanne
Steve,
Keep going...you are such an encouragement to me. As I have just begun my journey and am already tired. I look ahead and see so much ground left to cover, that it looks almost impossible, even though I have already come so far. And just like Estelene, I have people who expect me to "suck it up" and act as though I'm exaggerating and trying to get attention. What little do people know! And to ask "how serious"...all cancer is serious, no matter what the stage. But even at Stage IV, there are very few people who understand and sympathize with my fight. But You...a different story altogether. You understand and encourage and lift me up. So with that...if I need to make you some homemade chicken soup to keep you going, then so be it! Keep running my friend...keep running.
Hey Steve:
You've come so far and the race is almost won! Keep going!!! If you need a "chicken soup push", here's one for you - PUSHHHHH...
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